You'll Do...For Now

Yes, you should. And yes, it's about time.
Try harder. But I think for now, you can make do with yourself.

A Thousand Beautiful Words

I realize you have given up on words.
People talk. You listen.
People write. You read.
And nowadays, even the wretched do it beautifully.
I realize you have given up on words.
Cause they've ceased to keep their sanctity.
And everyone is wise, and you...a wise cynic.
I realize you have given up on words.
How could you not, after all you've seen?
The abuse. The mindless abuse.
In every corner, by every being.
I realize you've given up on words.
Decided, to never ever take it in,
To never be that fool again,
Cause you've been there and done that,
And that's cost more than you could think.
That's cost more than they could think.
I realize you've given up on words.
And yet, you battle on still...
Quite hopelessly, quite helplessly.
It's an ugly war you're in.
I realize you've given up on words.
You hate your own voice, occasionally.
And love your silence for all it speaks.
Until nothing ever speaks...
No words, not even silence,
Nothing speaks....
I realize you've given up on words.
Have you now, finally?
If tomorrow you read a thousand beautiful words,
What would you make of it?

April Goodbyes

The orange sun hangs low on these skies
And I am afraid of April goodbyes...
You're as beautiful as you ever were
Perhaps even, a tad more than before...
But I guess you're right, you must go
Hurry on then, yes you must go
Before it's winter and it snows...

Traveller

I love how the wind blows through my hair on these country roads,
The sound of  tires on the gravel, the cloud of dust trailing after us,
As a lone pair of headlights make their way home...
I love how the sun sets in your country and how the moon shows up early in the twilight,
And how your eyes light up at the sight of your cottage....
Would you take me in, just for the night? Find me a place under your twilight sky?
I think I'm home for tonight...

Why We Need Music

The best of writers never knew how to express everything in words.
The best of painters fell short of colors, to paint all they could see.
The best of actors never had enough tears, or beguiling smiles...
For your every shiver, laugh or weep.
That is when they created music.
To fill the space in between.
Every vacuum, every void,
With palpable beauty.

Love After Love

This is how I love you now,
Like I wanted to.
There is nothing left to fear,
And no more left to prove.
We've hurt our share, all we could.
And lost, all we had to lose.
And I...am no longer afraid, of losing you.
And you, you're no longer afraid of "I love you."
There's no suspicion anymore,
Been too long for expectations.
But, there's comfort in familiarity,
There's safety...
And it's in your eyes.
This is how I love you now,
Like I wanted to.
And this is the kind of love...
"The love after love"

Of Knowing You

I know you in ways I couldn't admit.
I know you so well, I wish I didn't.
I know what's on your mind,
And what you're about to say.
I know exactly...how was your day.
I know your future, like I know your past,
And I know that I can't tell you that,
Cause if I do, you'd never believe,
And if I do, you'd only leave.
Either way, I'll only bleed.
I'm no psychic, no magician
I only know you well.
And I wish I didn't know you so well.

Between Alone and Lonely

And she said....

"The brave are always alone,

And the cowards, always lonely.

In the end, it's never much of a choice is it?"

Cause I Don't Like Apple Pie

Remember that day in last September?
There was a sudden change in the weather?
A slight chill in the air, but pleasant all the same.
We were both tired and  hungry.
And all we really wanted was to find a place to sit?
So we walked down to Sid's corner.
We'd ordered tofu, black beans in sauce and some rice.
And then you'd asked me if I'd like apple pie for dessert?
And I had said I don't mind.
Actually, I did mind. I don't know why, but I don't like it at all.
And I don't know why I'm telling you this right now.
But you need to know this.
You said you love me, yesterday.
And I....I'm not sure, it's me.
You see, I don't like apple pie.
And I've had people fall for someone else before.

As The Day Fades

I like watching the sun bounce off broken glass. Don't you?
In fact, I've always loved light on broken glass. So pretty.
Hey, stop bobbing in and out of sight, love.
Your hair smell lovely, by the way.
You know, I love the song 'Chasing cars'. Snow Patrol's so good.
Huh? What are you saying? Slow down...
Does it hurt???
Well... I can taste my blood through my teeth.
And my knee's sticking out at a weird angle but, I can't really feel my leg.
You think the shoulder's broken too?
And there's a dull ache in my arms, but, nothing hurts as much as you think it would.
I guess it's my nerves...doing what they're supposed to do.
Switching off. So it doesn't hurt.
But my chipped tooth hurts, bad.
Tooth aches, seriously - worst things.
Shoot!... My project proposal's due tomorrow.
Yeaah....I guess...He'll understand.
Funny, I'm wasting time thinking about this right now.I must be Scrooge.
I mean... isn't this time for some kind of a divine intervention?
I mean... I'm probably not going to make it. This is the end.
This is my end.
I like laying here, I don't want to move.
And these leaves above are beautiful. The sky seems clear today.
I should probably tell you how much I love you right now though, right? Right...
Well, I do love you, there's never been doubting that, and mom and dad and baby bro...
You can tell them for me...It's just somehow I can't seem to mouth the words, my throat's dry.
But I'll try, "I love..."
There, said those two words... you can take it from here.
But really,
You know I've always loved the song 'Chasing cars'.
And your hair smell good, really good.

All I Wish For You This Year

A whole new year has been laid out in front of you, so you can begin anew.
Make new mistakes, and paint some fresh strokes into your life.
I hope this year finds you in perfect health physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
I hope you find yourself in peace, loved and in love.
I hope you have time to make new friends, and rediscover old ones.
I hope you find that 'family' only makes living easier.
I hope this year finds an awakened you.
That somehow even the nation and the world take a turn for the better.
That we all realize 'hate' is silly, finally.
That newspapers start to make your day. And so does your job.
I hope you find the world is a beautiful place.
And that there is hope and safety.
That faith is not just foolishness. And that passion pays.
Most of all, I wish you love, all over again, as I always have.
And I hope you know, I love you, always.
In spite of your secrets,
In spite of knowing you so little, as you would have me believe,
Even though sometimes, we are nothing like each other...
I love you.
Have an amazing year!

Merry Christmas!

I hope you're all doing well. Much Love and Merry Christmas!

Wish You Music

I hope once in a while, you discover new music.
And I hope sometimes, you have the occasion to sit and bleed, blissfully.
And on certain days, I hope, the best thing that happens to you, is your playlist.
I hope you find magic and the answers you've been looking for.

Hang In There, My Madness

Dear Madness of mine, I love you. I love you more than you can imagine, more than I usually admit. You have always wished me well and I am grateful.You have been my greatest possession. It's true. But for now, I must leave. You see the world never understood your sister, Freedom and never took seriously dear Love. And right now, Routine calls, and you know how he is.... humorless. Ever since Time once outran him, he's never forgiven himself. I must leave now, only to return. Wait for me, won't you? Please don't leave me. You are my own and I love you so. Please stay with me, always.

Kinds Of Love

Cause there is I love you, i luv u, love ya and love you. And, they are not all the same.
And then, there is me and you. 

A Disaster Of Your Making

If you knew how much I love you, you would never forgive yourself.

You

You, are your hopes and dreams.
Your love and lust.
Your fears and courage.
And all your words.
You...are the universe.
Floating on a speck of dust.

How I See It

Misconception : God exists and loves you.
In truth : Love exists and gods you.

All I Want... Is Everything

They say, "You can't have everything."
But I am a fool.....
I will always dream of having everything.
And my everything is you.

In The Movies

The sun would have shone on us warmly, as you told me you love me

There would have been no scorching heat...

And we would have kissed right under that tree, cause there would have been no bumble bee

I was afraid of.... 

If You Pass Me By

And for one crazy second I thought I should let you know...
Nobody can love you the way I do.
But then you seemed content, and troubled with far more pleasant things...
And I hoped you were so.
And in silent prayers, I thanked a god I've never known
But if you ever pass me by on a street
Could you tell me you were happy? 

If You're Lost, But There

I know this was not where you thought you'd be.
And nothing's gone the way you wanted.
And there's no sense to life, when all you've ever perceived as sense is lost.
And you don't know what to dream of, when you're in a dream too late
But if you've managed to keep breathing so far....
Would you please stay on....
And would you dream a new dream for me.
And should you need someone to tell you this...
You're doing just fine.

Shh...It's A Secret

You were missed today. But don't tell anyone I told you that. They didn't want you to know that.

In Your Sky

At first you were the summer breeze just palpable on my skin.
And I was in love with you, your smell, your touch, your soft tug at me.
But I should have known you would take me down, for you were the wind.
And I should have known you'd storm away with pieces of me.
And I should have known I'd never find myself, once you'd dealt with me.
But should you care, I was yours, even in your fury. 

Train Back Home

"Hey, looking for a train?"
"Yes, I've bought a ticket to a train back home.Could you please tell me where these trains go?"
"Well, this one goes west, that one south east, that one north, and I'm not really sure about that one."
"Thanks, that must be the one."
"But hey kid, I don't know where that train goes!"
"That's alright cause I don't know where is home."

Terminal Love

I have too much love running through my veins.
I'll drain out my life loving you.

Mother

And amid all the harshness, I know the world is beautiful.
That there is tenderness and there is love.
That they exist and are real.
Cause you are...cause you are...

The Part Of You, You Don't Own

You don't know. But, I've been stealing.
I've saved a smile of yours.
A frown from behind that desk.
Your face, your eyes, that scar.
The tilt of your head, from yesterday, at 15 degrees.
That mole on your neck.
The smell of your hair, and the wind that blew through it.
The vibrations of your voice.
A tear, and the light that shone off it.
Your walk, that walk. Your words, every word.
Your laugh, your gasp.
The way you sound when you're out of breath.
A little song you'd hummed just the other day.
That clumsy skip you made on your way.
A weird noise. A feisty reply.
A really funny, awkward goodbye.
A silly "huh?", a helpless "why?"
A stubborn "No", a silent cry
A look of anger on your face.
A look of sorrow, Of peace....
A look of turbulence, A look of hope.
And a naked look of love.
I've taken a million snapshots of you in my head.
I've recorded your every word, heartbeat and footstep.
I have exhausted my memory space with you.
And I've stolen every second I could
And saved you, in a place safe even from time.
And in this moment, this ache. It's mine.
Mine to cherish. Mine to keep.
Mine to live with.
There's a part of you, you do not own.
And This part of you...is mine.

On Being Okay

"How are you?"
"I'm ok, I'm....okay."
You know what's going on inside the man who says 'I'm ok' twice.

Why

Tell me why, why is that...
Thieves come together, but saviors do not?
The haters collude, but lovers stray further apart?

Of Stolen Bicycle Rides

"Shh....Quiet. Brother's asleep. Now's the time, quick, sit behind me."
And we hurtled down the cobbled streets and let the wind chase after you and me. 

Losing You

Don't put me through this. I can't take it. How can you?

Please don't. Not yet. Not just yet. Don't go.

Stay. Please stay. Say whatever. Don't just take it all.

Please don't just fall apart.

You win, like you always do, so stay please?
I just can't watch losing you to you. 

I'm Here

And this was just to let you know that...if you want to talk about it, or avoid it completely, I'm here.

For I Will, For You

And if it's okay with you, let me miss him for you.

I've Been Told

I've been told
That I can only hurt so much, and then no more.
I can only love so much, and then my heart itself will run dry.
I can only miss someone, so much, and then even helplessness will numb itself
That time, time is something that will always leave me embarrassed
About my faith in my emotions, my beliefs, my love
And make a fool out of me.
That I'll only ever know I've been fooled once it's too late.
That someday, I will realize I've been silly....
And hide away from my past lovers, once I can't begin to imagine why I ever fell in love with them in the first place.
That I should hide away from the one I love anyway, until I can fall out of love.
That until I fall out of love, I will believe they're mine in every breath, even if I know they're not.
That it doesn't pay to not let people escape your heart, once they've escaped from your life.
That they will escape someday, anyway
That I'm my only enemy
That I can live, love, fall again
That everything can be just okay and that's as good as it ever gets
I've been told...
I've been told...
I've been told...
But I'm only a fool
And I will only ever, hurt so much, love so much and miss you....just so much.

The Kind Of Smile

"What are you looking for?"
"A smile..."
"Oh! There are plenty of pretty smiles here.You'll find one."
"That's not it, I'm looking for a particular kind."
"A particular kind? What kind?"
"The one that has nothing against me."

But You Had To Know

I wish I had whispered in your ear "There's more, there really is more."
But when I saw you that day, I knew, Nothing I said could ever surprise you.

I'm Not Guilty

There have been times...
I've killed myself over my smile.
Let you slip off my mind for just a second,
and then returned to you, terrified...
I've hurt enough and so much
I've cut myself, to keep my wounds bleeding...
I'm alive and I've felt it. And for this I'm forever grateful.
But I need you to know this...
I'll save you your place, always.
You can come and go, as you please.
But should I choose to live now, I'm not guilty.

As We Danced Into The Night

The colors bounced off your skin, as I looked at you in awe.

Soft music played into our ears, and time promised to stay a while...

As we danced into the night.

An Afternoon Of Simpler Things

Lets lay on our backs, on the floor. And do nothing, once more.

Don't talk of life or love, or of the world. We don't have to.
Talk about the weather, your tan, the weekend groceries.
Lets glide into the evening and stick to simpler things.

The Anti-Climax

Oh! You'll get there eventually. But when you do, you'll know less than you did before and wish you'd gone a little slow. And when you do, you won't know where to go anymore.

Truth Be Told

No, I've never wanted you to love me. I love you too much.
I could never wish you pain, even if I were to stay.
I could never risk your heart, what if I could break it apart?
And believe it or not, but it's true, I love my freedom more than you.

The Child From Everywhere

"Home is where the heart is" or at least so he was told.
So he broke his into pieces. And then powdered it to dust.
Then sprinkled it across the world, till it was everywhere.

Of Homecoming

"You're beautiful!" I smile at your greens. " And your waters, I've missed you."
"You're back", you smile at me. "You know, home will always take you."

In Seek Of Permission

If I told you I understand, you couldn't love me too.

Then would you please, let me love you?

Of Goodbyes

It's a small small world.
We will meet again.
You won't remember me.
But I'll love you just the same.

The Thing About Pain

There are only two ways to get rid of pain. And one of them is to feel it.
To kill it, leaves a stench.

Motion Blur

These days I can't keep up....
Perhaps the world's too fast for me, or maybe it's too slow.
The days fly by in seconds, but the years are all the same.
And nothing really catches my attention, since you've been gone.

Until The Day I Leave

You can take me for granted. It's okay, I don't mind at all.
I'll be right here, just in case, as long as I am yours.
But the day I leave, I'll leave without a word. And I won't be found.
Then again, that is, that is not for now.

Never mind

There were things I wanted to tell you. Things I had in mind. But you'd only smile and take me for a child. It's okay. Never mind.

A Note Of Thanks To pleasefindthis

http://www.iwrotethisforyou.me/
Here's a blog I hope you will all check out. And then read the book - I Wrote This For You. For just about anything I write has been influenced by 'pleasefindthis / me'. So Thank you 'pleasefindthis' for much love, and spreading love and goodwill on a regular basis. Don't know of  anyone who did the job any better. And to everyone else, I'm sure you'll enjoy the read. :)

The Who I'd Become

And I'll replace all my photo frames with serene landscapes.

Erase my way out of lives, quietly, violently.

Hope to be forgotten, cause you forgot me.

Cause no one else matters, or ever will.

The Funny Thing Is

No matter how many times I promise myself I should give up, I don't.
And the world says let go, when I'm holding on and hold on, when I'm letting go.